February 27


I had a message from a mate on LinkedIn yesterday.

He said:

You do realise there’ll get a point in life when people come to an important decision and instead of the usual “what would Jesus do?” Or “what would Yoda do?” They say “what would Jon McCulloch say/do?” and all will be well.

What he didn’t realise (and couldn’t have known) was it already happens — and it’s been happening for years.

Terry and Drew, friends, clients, and members of my Elite mastermind since day one, have been so enamoured with the advice I've given to them over the past few years, they sometimes stop and ask themselves (literally), "What would Jon do?".

That's high praise indeed, and if I wasn't the most arrogant fuck on the planet, I'd be tempted to show some humility (tried it once but it was horrible. Never again).

Oh, and they're coming along to Elite in a week or so… after probably eight years of following me religiously (kind of)

Eight years. Jesus.

And then there’s my muchly hated and long-suffering coach, Vicki La Bouchardiere (stupid name for a stupid woman), who said :

Ha ha - I'm not the only only who says "What would Jon do?" then!

I say it to [her daughter] when she needs a "Man Up" moment. I often show your emails to her - she thinks you are hilarious. 

As you can imagine her world is full of hot/cold inter-teenager relationships at the moment, and sometimes it really gets her down. When someone is giving her a hard time I say "What do you think Jon McCulloch would say?" and that makes her laugh and get a better perspective.

Thanks for being a bad-ass superhero!


And look! 

She actually gave me a kiss and called me a superhero. Told you I was irresistible to women. Even the ugly ones.

Nowadays she’s more likely to slap me across the head and call me “retard”, “fuckface”, or “Jonty”. And all with good reason, I might add. 

Because I’m a… um… “challenging” person to coach, I’m sure. Not because I’m resistant to the work we do. On the contrary, I’m easy like that, she says. No, rather it’s because she’s had to learn how I communicate and process things. Not many people have the persistence or nous to do that. So she’s not completely useless. 


… why does this happen?

Because they ain't fucking stupid.

And they know I'm not, either.

So they listen to me, take my advice (even when it’s painful), and in my absence ask themselves what I’d do.

That should tell you a lot.

What about you?

You open to listening to what I have to say?

Because if you are, and you’d like to help me and Connor in our superhero mission to save the High Street from itself and the indolent victimhood of the majority of business owners, you’re going to want to be there at Ground Zero when the shit hits the fan.

Because you can guess who’s gonna be the one holding the fan, right?


Click here for Ground Zero details


P.S. Although I mercilessly tease, rib, and insult Vicki, she knows it’s the highest form of praise I can give. Few people elevate themselves in my esteem to a point where I’ll never, ever say anything nice about them in case they get the impression I have any affection for them whatsoever.

In contrast, if I’m being polite and friendly, the chances are I either don’t know you and am hedging my bets, or I think you’re a dick.

Anyway… the point is, if you’re in business and you’re looking for a superb coach to help you pick your way through the minefield we all lay out for ourselves, then Vicki’s your man. 

Well… woman. Hard to tell sometime, to be honest. The beard and hairy legs confuse me.

If you’d like me to put you in touch, email me and I’ll pass your details on (but do NOT fuck her about by prevaricating, dilly-dallying, or procrastinating — excellence has a price, and Vicki’s excellent… and if you piss her off, you’ll piss me off, and that’s rarely a good idea).

But if trusting your life and business to a frumpy old tart isn’t your thing and you’d rather deal with someone smart and help save the High Street (a worthy idea, one must admit)…

Click here for Ground Zero details


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